I've been meaning to get these up on the blog for a week now - as you can tell I haven't been too successful! We went to my parents last weekend and got to spend time with my 2 neices that I don't seem to see as much as I'd like! Bailey is 7 and Erika is almost 3 - they both act like they're going on 13!! If you question their looks, I'll make it easy for you - they have different dads and that's why they look nothing alike! lol

Trampoline Fun!! (notice in some pics how Erika tries to do everything like her big sister!)



















My little sister decided to join the fun (Hannah, 17)


And here's my older sister, Sara - mom of the two girls:


Lastly, here's my mom, both sisters & bailey:


Wait, I can't forget to share with you my two babies!!! =)

Sadie's Elvis impersonation:


And baby bean!


And yes, you will never get a bare belly shot EVER! Get over it, I'm saving you from haunting images that will scare you for life! LOL (That was taken last weekend, 16w3d) It's hard to tell because I'm overweight to begin with - but I'm definitely showing now. I haven't gained a lb but my pants are getting so tight! lol

I'm 17w3d pregnant and still, the announcement of a family member being PG just stings to the core! I hate IF! I love this family member and we're like sisters... but for pete's sake - can anyone in this world (in terms of my family) NOT get PG so easily! I know, that's horrible for me to say, but jeez!! Why was it just me? Why were we the only ones who struggled... if only just ONE family member went through it too - I would have someone who understood my feelings.

I always say I wouldn't wish "infertility" on my worst enemy... but would I? I swear, I'm not a bad person - just trying to sort out these feelings I'm having regarding the recent news.

She's only 2 months behind me (just found out today) and I know we'll be constantly compared to each other. She'll be doted on for being PG and getting married, etc and my news is now history. Is it just PG hormones... because I'm feeling like she's stealing my thunder!

On the other hand, I'm happy because we'll have children close in age! We're so close in age and grew up together so I want my child to have that as well! Ack! These feelings suck!!

So yeah, I'm not in my happy place today - I'll try to be tomorrow. =)

I had to jump out of bed and write this down, because by tomorrow my brain will be mush and I will likely forget! =)

Today, 7/16/08, was the first day that I listened to my baby's heartbeat...not because I was scared, worried, or fearful of the unknown (like every other night) - but because I just wanted to say hi.

Infertility has had me on the ground and broken... I will never be the same. Today showed me that there is hope and that I won't always be that person... negative and fearful of things unknown. I'm not promising that I won't be broken tomorrow - but today I'm optimistic and I have faith that goods thing do happen.

Trust me, it's a pretty big day in my book.

DIY ultrasound =)

I went to my mom's office today to get a sneak peek at the baby! Her machine is super crappy and the quality of the pictures are super grainy but it was worth it! We weren't able to get a look at the gender, but that's okay. (That will be in another month or so!) The baby was moving all over the place! S/he was waving, kicking, flipping, doing backbends, etc! It was amazing to watch!!

It was so much fun to lay there and ultrasound myself - it was bonding time for baby and me! lol It was amazing to see how much the baby has grown from our last ultrasound!! Again, the pictures don't do the baby justice as the screen was much clearer - but you get the idea!

16w5d