"The jump is so frightening between where I am and where I want to be...because of all I may become I will close my eyes and leap!”

I absolutely love this quote and it definately applies to my life right now. I'm about to approach a very overwhelming and somewhat scary process but the only thing I can do is leap. I know this is what we are supposed to be doing right now, everything is in it's place. It's just a waiting game and hoping for the best... no holding back now.

I met with the new RE on Tuesday and he was amazing! There is no comparison between him and the old RE, no comparison at all! I loved the office, the whole feel of it was different. This doctor seems to know 10 times more than the old RE and he isn't going to play the waiting game, praise the Lord!

It was funny because as he was explaining things to us and then got on the topic of age. I'm 24 and I know most people are shocked when they find out we have to do IF treatments so soon... but the first thing the doctor said was, "you're young, but this is what you need." Any other doctor (old RE and primary care) have said numerous times... "just relax, you're so young - enjoy life right now!" That just infuriates me! Yes, I'm young but we've also been TTC since 6/05! Give me a break! Oh well, that doesnt matter anymore because I have a doctor on MY side! (He better be since we are paying him boat loads of money! LOL) He said some other very comforting things to me as well, things that made me want to hug him! :) Basically he made me feel about 100 times better about myself.. no doctor has ever given my that feeling! It's such a refreshing experience!

Today is cd2 (reminds me I need to change my chart - darn spot lasted forever this cycle!) so tomorrow Mike & I go in for bloodwork. I better drink a ton of water before we go because they are doing about 10 tests a piece on us, that's a lot of blood! Next Tuesday (1/22) I go in for a SHG and Uterine sounding (whatever the heck that is!) and then it's just a waiting game!! When AF starts again I will begin bcp's... I hope it all goes fast at that point! I think I'll start stims the 2nd week of March!!! I can't believe it... it's so surreal! We're doing IVF - I never thought we would get to this...never in a million years.

One last thing - I was talking to my boss (yeah, the stupid beotch!) about needing next Tuesday off for testing and she asked how things were going. I tell her only the basics but did tell her that we were doing IVF/ICSI and her response was priceless.. "Oh cool! You going to be like a science experiment... that's so neat!" Umm, yeah - so neat. It's just so neat spending that much money to start a family! Whatever. What would be neat would be for her sorry butt to give me a raise! Now THAT would be cool! LOL She's a freaking idiot!